Posted by:
Mikki
| Comments
2009 is gone, and I have awakened unto 2010. I stop this morning to reflect on 2009 and look forward to 2010. As a matter of accountability, I’ve already looked back at the goals I set for 2009 to see how I did in regard to them. I am pleased. 2009 was a year of continued change for me. Certainly I didn’t score 100% but in my blog, Welcoming 2009, I notice that I gave myself permission to resolve to resolve imperfectly! So I did not fail.
I often use Proverbs 24:16 when I teach about the Christian life. This verse tells us that even though a righteous person may fall seven times, they shall rise again. It then goes on to contrast the righteous person’s response to failure with the wicked person’s response to failure and states that the wicked are overcome by their failure and calamity. I love to use this verse to teach believers that even though we may fall and stumble, the ongoing direction of our life should be toward godliness. I often draw a graph which illustrates the highs and lows of the Christian life.
So with a backwards glance at 2009, I look now to 2010. What are my goals for this year? I think of the old adage which says, “If you aim at nothing, you are sure to hit it.”
So here is my aim:
1. To know myself more deeply, because in knowing my own heart I gain the ability to know God and others in real ways
2. To pursue a deeper understanding of God’s grace
3. To face my shortcomings and failures truthfully with a willingness to change
4. To have a goal of progress, instead of perfection
5. To give love and support to others and receive the love and support of others
6. To recognize things that keep me from growing, such as denial and fear, and then move through and beyond them
7. To use the influence I have on others in ways that lead them into a deeper relationship with God and others
8. To be increasingly less religious and more Christ-like
9. To continue to break the power of the past
10.To live within my limits
11.To learn to easily identify what I am feeling inside
12.To allow Christ to change me
13.To resolve conflict in clear, direct, and respectful ways
14.To admit when I am wrong and ask for forgiveness
15.To be able to enter others’ worlds and feelings, connecting deeply with them
16.To truly listen when others speak and sincerely try to hear their heart
17.To love well, beginning with loving myself as Christ taught
18.To read and receive from others who are life-giving
19.To enjoy myself
Well, maybe that list is a little long, but it is a true reflection of my heart and is a reflection of what I learned in 2009.
Journey on my fellow pilgrim! 2010 awaits us.
Posted by:
Mikki
| Comments
To everything there is a season,
A time for every purpose under heaven:
A time to be born,
And a time to die; Ecclesiastes 3
We, as humans, live with the knowledge that one day we will die.
Maybe I am thinking about this since I am about to have my 50th birthday. Now I am not planning to die anytime soon, but I am beginning to live with the realization that I am aging. I must admit it is bothering me a little. I have told all my friends and family that there better not be any black balloons at my birthday party. I may be aging, but I am not dying and I do not want to cry at my party.
Some of my family and friends have been asking me what I’d like to receive as a gift on this special birthday. When my daughter-in-law asked what I wanted, I gave her the name of an anti-aging cream!
I don’t think of myself as, well, older. In some ways, I still think I am that invincible teenager who could fearlessly climb to the top of a cheerleading pyramid. Surely I am still that young girl who woke up at 6 a.m. ready to conquer the day and needing no coffee to do so.
But I have come to accept, reluctantly, that my body is aging. I have joints that ache, mostly from jumping off pyramids! And my body says that it would have been much wiser to have taken better care of it before now. Read more...
Posted by:
Mikki
| Comments
Today is my birthday. I am 49.
My birthday is always filled with ambivalence as I feel a sense of sadness because my twin brother, Mike, is no longer here on the earth with me. I miss him and regret not spending more time with him and helping him more through his difficult seasons. And strangely enough, today was my adopted parents’ wedding anniversary. So I miss my father today, too. I wish I could feel his hug and hear his laugh. And I’ve lost so many relationships this last year.
And this past year was so difficult. Not a year I would ever want to relive.
Yet birthdays are supposed to be for celebrating. I have much to celebrate.
My marriage is stronger. Eddie and I have endured the storms this year and learned much about ourselves. We have learned new communication skills and better ways to cherish one another. We are finding that as we always knew, marriage is hard work – like all real relationships. But we have found a more precious intimacy with each other that is bringing me much joy.
My children are doing well. Andrew is married and has his own business. I have watched him mature into such a strong, talented young man. I always say he was my best birthday gift ever as he was born on Dec. 9, and I brought him home from the hospital on my birthday. I have always been amazed at what a wonderful person he is in spite of my lack of parenting skills with a first-born child. Read more...
