Mikki's Blog - Living in the Grace and Love of God » Encouragement

The Starting Point

Mikki — Fri, 30 Jul 2010 20:42:52 +0000

Sometimes the processes of our lives could be best represented by a circle. We start at a certain point, sure that we have all the answers, cocky, self-assured, ready to conquer the world and move aside all the poor fools who have so much less understanding than we do. However, life with its hard knocks and deep valleys, has a way of enlightening us and leveling the ground of our self-importance. We often find that we weren’t quite as “right” as we first thought. We come full circle and learn to see the wisdom in some of the ones who have gone before us in this journey called life. We experience hurt and pain. We are wounded.

And a most peculiar thing happens for those who open their hearts to learn. We find that our wounds have the potential of becoming a source of healing for others.

I suppose that we have two basic choices when life wounds us – and it always does in one way or another. We can shake our fists at the pain, curse those who brought it, and become angry, resentful, and bitter, demanding payment from the world and life itself for surely we deserve retribution for the wrongs committed against us. Or we can allow God to bring beauty out of our woundedness.

If we are to truly make a difference in this life, it seems to me that the starting place for that is the place of our woundedness. Why would such a thing be true?

I can only speak from my own experience. My wounds give me understanding. They give me compassion. They are a source of humility. They make me approachable. They are a point of connection to hurting humanity.

Hebrews so beautifully paints this picture of Christ as One who can be “touched” by our weaknesses. Christ is approachable, touchable, accepting of our hearts while dealing with our sins.

Early in 2008, it appeared that my life had completely come unraveled. From all practical points of view, my entire life lay at my feet in a million broken pieces. Although I tried to frantically gather those pieces into my arms, it was as sand slipping through my hands. Despite all my best efforts, I lost. I could no more gather up the pieces than I could catch the wind. All I knew of the dreams I believed God had given me slipped away from me and I found myself in the deepest darkest desperation I’d ever known. The systems I’d built on failed. The structures failed. I saw no escape from the pain but perhaps death itself.

And although it didn’t happen overnight, God began to heal my heart. God redeemed. He redeemed my life. He redeemed my dreams. He redeemed my ministry. He redeemed my marriage. And the redemption still continues. I’ve seen relationships redeemed. I experienced the comfort of God through His beautiful servants. I’ve tangibly experienced Isaiah 61: 3, beauty for ashes, the oil of joy for my mourning, the garment of praise in exchange for my mourning.

Yesterday, I was checking out at a local business. The beautiful young woman who worked there looked at me and asked, “How are you?” And I knew from her eyes that it wasn’t a rhetorical question. She knew my story. The question has been asked of me so many times in the last 2 ½ years. So many times I’ve wanted to run. I’ve felt shame. I’ve felt the pain all over again. But I have learned to accept the care and love so many have offered. For the most part, I’ve come to embrace the moment. So I said, “I am doing well.” In a moment she pursued, her eyes full of love, “How are you doing?” “I’m really doing well”, I replied and continued, “Do you know me?” And she shared how she knew me and my story. Once again, she asked me, “How are you?”, her eyes full of pain.

I think I’ve learned something of what it means to be authentic. I offered, “It’s really been hard. We’ve (my husband and I) have done a lot of hard work. We’ve spent five weeks with a marriage counselor. We’ve grown so much. We’re so much better than we’ve ever been. We’ve learned so much about communication.”

We talked for close to an hour. She was experiencing her own pain. I offered to her what I have found. God cares. He understands. I didn’t offer her religious answers. I offered her healing from the place of my woundedness. I didn’t feel that I needed to give her empty promises. I didn’t offer her a quick fix. But I did offer her love and care. I offered to talk, to pray, to do anything I could.

And she shared a very personal story of how much my husband and I had blessed her more than once and tangibly helped her in years past. I left so blessed. How beautiful and mysterious are the ways of God! My willingness to step into the temporary pain of the moment had unlocked the door for an amazing God encounter.

Something we had “sown” in years past, I now “reaped” in the form of love and care and encouragement. And at the same time, I was able to sow back into her life in the present moment.

Allowing another to enter my life and come close to me had opened the door for my wounds to be a source of healing as I pointed to Christ who is our Healer. And I thought of how the Scripture says that by His stripes we are healed. He is our wounded Healer.

As we recognize our humanity and brokenness, this recognition has the potential to be the starting point of true ministry. As we become aware that we don’t have to deny or escape our pain, we can humbly offer those very broken places as the bridge which leads others from despair to hope.

As I pondered these thoughts this morning, I have found myself in deeper wonder and amazement at God and His ways. My heart is led to acknowledge that there truly is none like my God who declares that we can rebuild the broken places and be a part of raising up a foundation for many generations. He satisfies my soul and strengthens me, making me like a watered garden and like a spring of water (Isaiah 58).

So it seems to me that the starting place of true ministry is often the healing we have found in our own lives. Dare we offer ourselves in the service of Christ to others?

The Starting Point

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Hope Against Hope

Mikki — Tue, 06 Jul 2010 14:50:16 +0000

Hopelessness leaves a man or woman frozen in despair.

Jesus understood that his disciples would be tempted to despair after his crucifixion so he spent time beforehand preparing them, counseling them, and providing hope for them.

Jesus told his disciples that he was leaving and they could not follow him. What kind of news is that when they had just given three years of their life responding to his invitation to “Follow me”?

Change was coming and Jesus tried to prepare his followers. He encouraged them not to allow their hearts to be troubled. How were they supposed to not be troubled when their leader was crucified? They had to have hope. If they could hope in what Jesus was sharing with them, they could look beyond their current crisis and believe that God was going to perform the things that Jesus had taught them.

Jesus told his followers that their separation would be temporary. He was preparing a place for them and they would be with him again.

He told them that they were about to do even greater works than the ones He Himself had done.

Jesus told them that the Father was about to send them a Helper, the Holy Spirit.

And Jesus shared many more words that contained both challenge and hope as recorded in John 14-16. Then he prayed for his disciples.

We find this pattern in Jesus’ ministry. He told Peter that he was about to deny him, but that when he was RESTORED, he would strengthen his friends. Jesus gave him some challenging words but he also gave him hope.

The same pattern is also observable in the lives of Paul and Peter. Sometimes their words were challenging, but there was always a thread of hope.

As Christians, when we interact with others we also need to offer hope. Even in the most desperate circumstance, we need to be able to look at others and believe that God can bring something beautiful out of the situation.

We don’t need to offer false hope or false promises. A person who is hurting can see right through a religious answer that feels like an insincere pat on the back. False hope and false promises feel as empty as a dry well because they are!

So how can we help someone in desperation?

We can acknowledge, honestly, the difficulty of their situation, the depth of their pain. Sometimes this is the most necessary step because it bridges the depths of the loneliness and desperation someone is feeling and says that we are honestly acknowledging where they are emotionally without condemning them. We often don’t know how God can accomplish what needs to happen in a life; we don’t have a formula or a fix but as another human being, we can say, “That must be really hard.” Such a response acknowledges the reality of the pain. Galatians 6:2 instructs us to bear one another’s burdens and this is one way to do that.

Then we can share from our own lives about times when God did something for us when life seemed impossible. This is the power of testimony – which according to Rev. 12:11 is one of the ways to overcome the enemy.

And we can humbly pray for those who are hurting, asking God to do what only He can.

Jesus told his disciples that it was about to be hard, but God would be faithful. And then he prayed for them.

Hurting people need “Jesus with skin on”. They need someone whom Jesus is living in and through to offer hope.

Sometimes we say that we are hoping against hope, a phrase which means that in spite of what looks impossible, we have hope that things will change.

Romans 5:5 tells us that hope doesn’t disappoint because it is based on the love of God.

Is there someone in your life who needs hope?

How can you offer hope to them?

Perhaps you just need to listen without feeling a need to fix anything or anybody.

Perhaps you need to call someone today to say you care.

Maybe a card of encouragement would be just the right thing.

How about a visit?

How about a hug? Many times I have just held someone and let them hurt in my arms. Words are not always necessary.

And as Jesus did, wrap what you do with a prayer for that person. I find that most people are more than happy for you to pray for them. Perhaps you can ask them, “Would it be okay for me to pray for you?” Then do so. It doesn’t need to be long or religious sounding. Don’t try to fix it in your prayer. Just honestly acknowledge the pain and ask for God to help. I often acknowledge in my prayers for others that I don’t know the answer, but I know that God does and I ask for His help. It is more than okay to not have the answers. You know the One who does!

I recently hear Dan Allender teaching and he asked this question which riveted me. He asked, “Who has wept with you and your story?” He suggested that we cannot unlock our stories alone. We need each other.

Will you weep with someone over their pain?

This burden bearing fulfills the law of Christ which is the law of love.

There is hope against hope. It exists because of Christ. Receive it and offer it. It is the intangible tangible.

Hope Against Hope

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Why Peter?

Mikki — Fri, 13 Nov 2009 16:01:10 +0000

Those familiar with the New Testament often refer to Peter as the disciple who opened his mouth to change feet. We think of Peter denying Jesus. Peter, the one who said what we all would like to say, “Jesus, how many times do I really have to forgive this person before I can say ‘That’s it. I have fulfilled my quota. I don’t have to forgive you anymore.’” Peter, who told Jesus,“You’ll never wash MY feet!” Sounds ridiculous now, but how would you have felt at that moment? We think of Peter cutting off Malchus’ ear. We think of his rash statement to Jesus, “I’ll never deny you!”

The first time we are introduced to Peter is when his brother Andrew brings him to Jesus. Immediately Jesus looks at Peter and begins to tell Peter about himself. Jesus said, “You are Simon, the son of Jonah, but you will be called Cephas.” Ever wonder what it felt like to be inside Peter’s skin at that moment? His brother, Andrew, told him that they had found the Messiah, the One they had lived all their lives learning about; the One who would rescue the Jewish nation; the One who would fulfill the prophesies. Perhaps Peter is skeptical at that first moment but also hopeful. Could this man be the One? And Peter begins his experiences with Jesus with an identity encounter. Jesus basically says, “Peter, I know you, and I know who you will become. You are going to change.”

I imagine that Peter looked back to that moment many times during his life. I believe it was a moment that he “hung his hat on”. A Hallmark moment. A moment that Peter could look back upon and be grateful for. A moment that Peter could cherish as he reflected upon the fact that Jesus knew all about him from the very first moment. I believe that moment was a gift to Peter.

We all long for someone to know us intimately. Someone to understand us. Someone to believe in our future. That was the beginning moment of Peter’s walk with Jesus.

Last night I pondered why Jesus made such a concerted effort to minister to Peter after Peter denied Him. Hadn’t all the disciples run away? They all deserted Jesus. Yes, Peter verbally said, “I don’t know the man”, but hadn’t they all basically asserted the same thing by their actions? And of course, I understand that Peter had a great destiny. God was going to use him mightily on the Day of Pentecost and beyond. But as I meditated on this last night, I had a feeling that there was more to it than that. Not that those factors were not important. Of course they were. But maybe another reason the Scripture is so purposeful in tracing Peter’s walk with Jesus is that it so adequately pictures all our lives.

We are up; then we are down. We have a success; then we fail. We say something profound; we say something stupid. We are bold; we are afraid.

But if God could use Peter whose journey with Jesus encompassed such extreme ends of life’s spectrum, perhaps the message to us is that our lives are also redeemable. Perhaps the message is that if Jesus intimately knew Peter right from the beginning – He knew that Peter would fail miserably – and yet he chose Peter, then maybe he also could also use us.

Peter was with Jesus right from the beginning of Jesus’ earthly ministry. He was there when the water was turned into wine. He was there when the loaves and fishes multiplied. He saw people dramatically healed. He ate with Jesus. He was there when the disciples argued about who was the greatest. He was at the Transfiguration and got a glimpse of Jesus’ heavenly glory. He was at the Last Supper. He heard the prophecies. Yet during Jesus most difficult days, Peter failed. He couldn’t stay awake when Jesus’ heart was anguishing in the Garden of Gethsemane. He denied Jesus to a servant girl. He denied him again. And not only did Peter fall asleep while he was supposed to be praying with Jesus, now he denies even being there! Then he denied Jesus to a man who was a relative of the Malchus. Malchus was with the crowd who came to arrest Jesus in the Garden. Peter drew his sword, cut off Malchus’ ear. Jesus rebukes Peter, again, and heals Malchus. Do you get that? Peter had been rash, reactive, and cut off the servant’s ear. Jesus fixes Peter’s mistake, and now Peter denies Jesus to Malchus’ relative.

But once again, Jesus had spoken beforehand to Peter. He had told him, “Peter, you will deny me three times but I have prayed for you already. Again Jesus knows Peter’s failure ahead of time. And he says, “I have prayed for you that your faith wouldn’t fail.” Notice that Jesus didn’t say that he prayed Peter wouldn’t fail. Of course, he didn’t want Peter to fail, yet he said he prayed that Peter’s faith wouldn’t fail. Ahead of time, Jesus tells Peter “When you have returned…” Do you think that Peter might have heard those words over and over after he denied Jesus? “When you have returned…When you have returned…” In his darkest moments, I imagine that these words resonated in Peter’s spirit and blew on the embers of his faith. Jesus knew I would fail, but he said I would return. Jesus understood that God would use Peter’s failure. It was not unredeemable. But he prayed that Peter would not lose his faith. I don’t think that Jesus was saying he was worried about Peter losing his salvation. I think he was saying that he was concerned that Peter’s failure not destroy him, but be used by God to strengthen others. “When you have returned, strengthen your brothers.”

I guess what I am saying in part is that it is easy to sanitize the Gospel. It is easy to only view the disciples through their glorious moments. But God’s Word takes pains to show us the fullness of human experience so that we can identify with what we would call the “great” men and women of God. Was Peter great? Yes, he was, but he was also a man. Flawed in ways. Weak at times. He had his moments when perhaps we would have said to him, “Duh, stupid.” Oh, we could never imagine that now because it would be less than reverent. But have we stripped away one of the aspects of humanness of God’s servants that God never meant us to? If we sanitize the Gospel so that only great, perfect people are the heroes, then the message to the world is that the Gospel is not for you. It is only for the strong. Oh, I know we would never actually say that, but is that in fact what we are saying to lost humanity when what God is trying to say is that the Gospel is for the weak, the foolish, the fallen. Please don’t misunderstand me. I am not excusing sin at all. I am not saying that there are excuses for our sinfulness. I am saying that there is provision for our humanness.

Oh, we might say that this was all prior to the crucifixion and that afterwards Peter was different. I beg to differ with you. What about after Jesus resurrection when he has breakfast with Peter. We still find Peter being Peter. Jesus tells him that there are some tough times ahead for Peter and then Peter basically says, “Well, Lord, if I am going to suffer, what about John?” to which Jesus replies, “That is none of your business, Peter. That is up to me.” Peter still has some things to learn.

Just a matter of days later, Peter is there when the Holy Spirit is poured out and with boldness he begins again to lead the disciples. He preaches on the Day of Pentecost. He proclaims to the lame man that there is a way to be healed. It is Jesus. Then after Pentecost, Paul has to correct Peter for shying away from the Gentiles when the Jews were around.

From failure to fullness. Peter, just an ordinary man, finds Jesus. He begins to follow him. And still today the Gospel message is preached through Peter’s life. God uses imperfect people. It is the message I have long loved. From the first moment I was captured by the idea that God could use me, I have been in awe of this message because I know my own heart. And just like Peter, I hang my hat on the revelation that God knows me intimately and yet loves me and works in and through my life.

Perhaps the words to the old hymn “When I Survey the Wondrous Cross” say it best of all. Love so amazing, so divine, demands my soul, my life, my all.

Why Peter?

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