More than once Jesus told his disciples to follow him. For the disciples to follow Jesus, they had to embrace a lot of change. Change in their everyday lifestyle. Vocational change. Change in family relationships. Change in religious beliefs. But those changes were a really just a reflection of deep inner change.
Signing up to follow Jesus means signing up for a lifetime of change. Change of heart. Jesus spoke so often about the heart because it is central to everything. What we do and say and believe and teach and model all flow from our hearts.
On one occasion, Jesus got into a boat and his disciples followed him. Sounds fun, huh? A day at sea or a journey to the other side.A huge storm suddenly appeared and the disciples found themselves in a boat which was literally becoming covered with waves. I would be afraid, wouldn’t you?They naturally looked to their leader. He was asleep. I don’t think they hesitated to wake him up. They said, “Lord, don’t you care that we are dying?”Makes sense to me.They have committed their lives to following Jesus. They followed him into this boat. A storm has arisen. Jesus must be unaware. After all, he is asleep. Read more...
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Many times I find myself reading in the Psalms, and many times I find “myself” in the Psalms. Their beauty leads me to do what they themselves often recommend. Selah. Pause and think about it. Layers and layers of truth and richness. The entire range of human emotions. The entirety of the Psalms including the Psalms of David express a true picture of humanness. Love and hate. Joy and grief. Praise and cursing. Ah, David, a man after God’s own heart, unafraid to feel and express his heart.
One of my favorites is Psalm 42, a Psalm written to describe one’s yearning for God in the middle of distress. The depth and truth of the Psalmist’s longing resonates within my heart.
As the deer pants for the water brooks,
So pants my soul for You, O God. 2My soul thirsts for God, for the living God.
When shall I come and appear before God?
The picture is of a mature deer, not a Bambi, a powerfully beautiful animal thirsting, longing for running, moving, living water. And then the Psalmist declares, “God, that is how I long for you! My soul, my inner being, my emotions, long for an encounter with a living God.”
Maybe there are two ways we learn about thirst. One is by natural processes of our humanness. We need water to live and thrive. Secondly, once we experience the power of having our thirst satisfied, we are forevermore dissatisfied with any other experience.
Paralleling that human experience with our spiritual thirst, we are created to know God in an intimate way. We were made to run our spiritual fuel tanks on God-a-nol. Secondly, once we have tasted what it means to have God quench our inner thirst, we can no longer be satisfied with any thing or any experience that falls short of encountering the true living God.
What does it mean to experience a living God? Well, what does life mean? Life must be distinguished from death. Easy, huh? Well the definition of life includes the fact that it is identified by growth, by changes that originate internally. A living God moves, speaks, sees, hears, and touches. Encountering a living God causes us to live, to grow and change internally.
What is going on in the Psalmist’s heart in Psalm 42 as he declares his longing? Is it, at least in part, a feeling of abandonment? The Psalmist says “How long will it be before I see your face God?” That’s my interpretation of appearing before God. In His presence. Seeing His face. When we are able to see someone’s face, we can look into their eyes and they can look into ours and we can know much about what is in their heart. It is hard to hide your emotions when someone peers into your eyes. We have heard that the eyes are the window into the soul and maybe that is true.
The Psalmist’s emotions rose up to accuse him. “Where is your God?” His enemies rose up to accuse him. “Where is your God?” Can we also conclude that his friends accused him? He was breaking the law and failing in his commitments. His emotions said that God had abandoned him. He was mourning because of the oppression of the enemy. His circumstances said that God had abandoned him.
In verse nine, the Psalmist cries out to God, “Why have you forgotten me?” The Psalmist found himself disconnected, disappointed, discouraged, disquieted. Disconnected with God, others (I used to go with the multitude), and his own soul. He was experiencing a loss of fellowship with others. He was experiencing a loss of the form of worship he was used to. I used to keep the pilgrim’s feast with the multitude. (How do you know God apart from your traditions?)
There was a way that he could stoke the fire of his experience of God. He spoke to himself. Sometimes we have to remind ourselves, aloud even, of what the truth is. The Psalmist declared, “I will hope in God. I will praise him.” Then this word “yet” is there staring at us. Here is the commitment…
Even though I am overwhelmed emotionally… Even though I don’t feel you God… Even though I feel alone…
