One of the most difficult lessons of my life has been how to live well, fully, and stayed anchored to the quiet voice of the Holy Spirit who teaches me when to say yes and when to say no. I find that this ‘lesson’ requires constant revisiting.

In recent years, a good indicator of if my life is in balance is my writing. For me, writing is restorative and is normally an easy flow. But when I hit days of being unable to put my thoughts together, times of staring at a blank Word document, I can be pretty much assured that it’s time to readjust my schedule.

And that’s where I find myself. I’ve had so many ‘extra’ things to do, good things, but yet things that take another slice of my life. I’m finding myself to be very tired even though I just finished a vacation (with my husband, kids, their spouses, and my granddaughter). It was so much fun, but now I need a personal vacation!

I love my work. It’s not tiring for me. I am energized when I counsel people and normally never mind going to work, yet today I want to stay home!

My body, soul, and spirit are saying, “Get back to balance!”

For my life to feel in balance, not only do I need to be a wife, mother, etc., but I need chunks of time to rest, to be by myself. I need quiet times with God.

Jesus modeled perfectly for us how to live in balance. He had everyone around him pulling on him for another conversation, another miracle, and he had it all. He had all the answers, all the healing, all the compassion, all the wisdom, all the encouragement. Jesus had the 12 who needed him; he had the inner circle who needed their time with him. Then there was the 70. Oh, and not to forget his own family, and the needs of the entire world and all who would be to come.

His answer was to say no often enough so that he could know when to say yes.

When it was necessary, Jesus said no to the crowds, no to his disciples, no to his family, so that he could say yes at all the right times.

We so often miss what I believe to be essential. Jesus came and lived his life as a man full of the Spirit of God. Yes, he was fully God, but he was fully man. He needed communion with the Father. If we don’t believe that Jesus lived as a man depending upon the Holy Spirit, then we won’t understand our need to do the same. If Jesus needed to say no to the demands of life and spend time with the Father, can we expect to live well without this time with God? Look at these examples from Jesus’ life:

Luke 6:12 One of those days Jesus went out to a mountainside to pray, and spent the night praying to God.

Luke 11:1 One day Jesus was praying in a certain place. When he finished, one of his disciples said to him, “Lord, teach us to pray, just as John taught his disciples.”

Luke 9:28 About eight days after Jesus said this, he took Peter, John and James with him and went up onto a mountain to pray.

Mark 1:35 Very early in the morning, while it was still dark, Jesus got up, left the house and went off to a solitary place, where he prayed.

Matthew 14:23 After he had dismissed them, he went up on a mountainside by himself to pray. Later that night, he was there alone,

Mark 6:46 After leaving them, he went up on a mountainside to pray.

Luke 6:12 One of those days Jesus went out to a mountainside to pray, and spent the night praying to God.

Luke 5:16 But Jesus often withdrew to lonely places and prayed.

Are you tired? Drained? Out of balance?

Do you need to draw away?

Can you feel God’s Spirit calling you away?

Will you say yes?

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One of the most difficult lessons of my life has been – and continues to be – how to live well, fully, and stayed anchored to the quiet voice of the Holy Spirit who teaches me when to say yes and when to say no. I find that this ‘lesson’ requires constant revisiting.

In recent years, a good indicator of if my life is in balance is my writing. For me, writing is restorative and is normally an easy flow. But when I hit days of being unable to put my thoughts together, times of staring at a blank Word document, I can be pretty much assured that it’s time to readjust my schedule.

And that’s where I find myself. I’ve had so many ‘extra’ things to do, good things, but yet things that take another slice of my life. I’m finding myself to be very tired even though I just finished a vacation (with my husband, kids, their spouses, and my granddaughter). It was so much fun, but now I need a personal vacation!

I love my work. It’s not tiring for me. I am energized when I counsel people and normally never mind going to work, yet today I want to stay home!

My body, soul, and spirit are saying, “Get back to balance!”

For my life to feel in balance, not only do I need to be a wife, mother, etc., but I need chunks of time to rest, to be by myself. I need quiet times with God.

Jesus modeled perfectly for us how to live in balance. He had everyone around him pulling on him for another conversation, another miracle, and he had it all. He had all the answers, all the healing, all the compassion, all the wisdom, all the encouragement. Jesus had the 12 who needed him; he had the inner circle who needed their time with him. Then there was the 70. Oh, and not to forget his own family, and the needs of the entire world and all who would be to come.

His answer was to say no often enough so that he could know when to say yes.

When it was necessary, Jesus said no to the crowds, no to his disciples, no to his family, so that he could say yes at all the right times.

We so often miss what I believe to be essential. Jesus came and lived his life as a man full of the Spirit of God. Yes, he was fully God, but he was fully man. He needed communion with the Father. If we don’t believe that Jesus lived as a man depending upon the Holy Spirit, then we won’t understand our need to do the same. If Jesus needed to say no to the demands of life and spend time with the Father, can we expect to live well without this time with God? Look at these examples from Jesus’ life:

Luke 6:12 One of those days Jesus went out to a mountainside to pray, and spent the night praying to God.

Luke 11:1 One day Jesus was praying in a certain place. When he finished, one of his disciples said to him, “Lord, teach us to pray, just as John taught his disciples.”

Luke 9:28 About eight days after Jesus said this, he took Peter, John and James with him and went up onto a mountain to pray.

Mark 1:35 Very early in the morning, while it was still dark, Jesus got up, left the house and went off to a solitary place, where he prayed.

Matthew 14:23 After he had dismissed them, he went up on a mountainside by himself to pray. Later that night, he was there alone,

Mark 6:46 After leaving them, he went up on a mountainside to pray.

Luke 6:12 One of those days Jesus went out to a mountainside to pray, and spent the night praying to God.

Luke 5:16 But Jesus often withdrew to lonely places and prayed.

Are you tired? Drained? Out of balance?

Do you need to draw away?

Can you feel God’s Spirit calling you away?

Will you say yes?

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Last Saturday when my niece, Whitney, appeared as a beautiful bride about to walk down the aisle to her soon-to-be husband, the excitement of hopes and dreams was intermingled with the disappointment of loss and grief. Her daddy, and my twin brother, Mike, was not on her arm. We lost him to heaven 15 years ago.

For the most part, we stayed focused on the joys of the moment but it was impossible not to feel the pain of loss. Many of us, including my niece, were wiping our eyes of tears as we simultaneously experienced the grief over what should have been and the joy over what was.

Awakening before 3 a.m. this morning, my brother was on my mind. When I lost him, I felt I’d lost a part of myself, and sometimes I just need to talk about him.

I could write a tribute to him and perhaps I will one day, but today I mostly just want to acknowledge that I haven’t forgotten him, that he was with us in our hearts on Whitney’s wedding day.  And God, who knows our hearts, kissed us all with the sweet presence of a double rainbow just as Whitney was to walk down the aisle. Just as rainbows allow us to see the colors of the sun that though normally unseen are always present, God seemed to be allowing the reality of Mike in heaven to be there with us, the always present truth that often escapes our awareness.

Just as a rainbow only occurs when sunlight and rain combine, as our joy and grief combined that day we experienced the message of hope that God gives. The message of both a purposeful present day and a future day to come.

I love you, Mike, and will see you again one day. 

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